Wheelie bin colour crisis: Brits demented due to Christmas holidays

by Dafty News

Three-quarters of the population are said to be in mental turmoil due to the stresses of not knowing which colour of bins to put out because of the festive season, it has been reported.

The rotation of recycled bin pick-ups carried out by local Burghs and councils is normally regimental throughout the year but the days between Christmas and New Year has resulted in a plague of breakdowns the length and breadth of the country, with many being sectioned in psychiatric units.

A mental health awareness campaigner hit out at the festive season refuse schedule when she said: “This is the most stressful time of the year and those already fragile suffer the most. Not knowing which colour of bin goes out can tip people over the edge.”

A spokesperson for one local council told Dafty News: “This is the fun part for us. Watching residents scratching their heads in their dressings gowns wondering which colour to take out and listening to all the ambulance sirens coming to take them away.”

Meanwhile, local councils aim to get their act together by sending out gritters with actual grit and screwing in street lamp bulbs clockwise.

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