Syrian Doctor Bemoans “Terrible Year for Dead Celebrities”

A doctor at a hospital in the beleaguered town of Aleppo in Syria spoke of his grief last night as he struggled to come to terms with the death of music legend, Prince, who passed away at his home yesterday, aged 57.

Cradling the broken body of a 3-year-old girl, killed just hours earlier in a government forces airstrike, Dr Ahmood Analfisi, 22, broke down repeatedly as he spoke of the latest addition to the steady procession of celebrities that have died since the beginning of the year.

“It was bad enough when Lemmy out of Motorhead was so cruelly taken from us” he said, blinking back tears. “Then it was that bloke out of The Eagles, followed by David Bowie, and, perhaps, most devastating of all; Grizzly Adams! How I’m going to break the news that Prince has now been taken from us to the kids in the intensive care unit I just do not know. We lost 20 yesterday after a heavy bombardment from Daesh forces on a local school, with another 60 or so badly wounded. In view of the tragic news about Prince, maybe those kids who didn’t make it were the lucky ones”

In other news, an estimated 400 migrants fleeing Afghanistan were drowned in The Aegean Sea. This comes just 4 months after Justin Bieber told distraught fans that he had a bit of a cold coming on.

 

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