Shoplifters’ Joy After Woolworths Announce High Street Comeback
SHOPLIFTERS up and down the country were celebrating this morning after popular high street brand Woolworths announced it will be making a comeback to the streets of Great Britain, it has emerged.
The store, famous for its pick ‘n’ mix sweets range, children’s clothing, and music records, was a popular haunt for thieves who pilfered anything and everything due to really poor quality security; and the fact the products on offer were useless anyway and no-one would bat an eye if they went missing.
A spokesperson told our reporters: “Woolworths decided to make a comeback but not to make money – they just want to take the piss.”
Meanwhile, it is understood the Governing Body For Shoplifters say they will demand CCTV cameras installed and the store to have really thick security staff at the door on £5.45 per hour wages to make the chase more exciting.
