RYANAIR ANNOUNCE PLANS TO BEAT UP ‘BARGAIN-HUNTING’ PASSENGERS

Budget airline, Ryanair, will give passengers paying less than £200 for a ticket a thoroughly good beating during flights it was revealed last night.

A spokesperson for the controversial airline, famous for their outrageous surcharging and abysmal customer relations, told Dafty News, “Anyone that we consider hasn’t paid a decent whack for a ticket will be giving a good clumping in the aisle by a designated Ryanair bully boy. If, as a result, they end up sparko, we reserve the right to go through the pockets for anything remotely of value and keep it”

This move comes just a month after Ryanair announced that passengers using the toilets would have to defecate onto a digital scale first and then be charged for the weight of each rocket.

 

 

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