The Queen Vows to Get ‘Absolutely Bladdered’ to Celebrate Her 90th Birthday

HER MAJESTY made a statement ahead of her birthday celebrations earlier today that shocked the nation.

Standing among her family members, it was clear the 90-year-old was desperate to get the party started.

A close aide to Buckingham Palace told Dafty News: “Elizabeth was raging when all the grandkids appeared. It is clear she will not touch a tipple when children are around and she is beginning to think it was a cunning plan to get her off the booze, by her tricky family.”

Her Majesty later announced:

“On this most momentous moment, I hereby declare that one shall be participating in a few wild sherries followed by a right good few pints.”

It is understood the taxpayer will be footing the bill for her all-day booze binge party bash that has left her local pub landlord seething.

He told Dafty News: “Great! Now I’ll have to declare the take-ins.”

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Dafty News

Dafty News

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