People in Glasshouses to be Given Bigger Stones

THE government announced today that everyone living in, or simply visiting glasshouses, will be handed the added bonus of being allocated bigger stones, it has emerged.

The move will see an end to age-old cliches and phrases the government wish to stamp out.

Prime Minister David Cameron outlined his plans to eradicate silly sayings with his first of many revamps of the use of the English language.

Cameron told reporters outside his Downing Street digs: “The time has come to let anyone and everyone inside a glasshouse do what they bloody well like without the fear of being philosophied by smart-arse morons.”

It is understood more plans are underway that include having as much cake as we want and being allowed to eat it, and laying in a bed that we didn’t actually make ourselves.




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