The Argentinian navy submarine that has been missing in the South Atlantic for 72 hours has been discovered at the bottom of Argentinian soccer legend, Diego Maradona’s bath at his home in Buenos Aires.
The sub has now been recovered from the depths of Maradona’s tub using heavy duty salvage equipment and the initial reports are that the captain and crew have all been accounted for and are safe and well, apart from a few men who had been overcome by the fumes from one of Maradona’s bubbly farts.
The 97-year-old “Hand of God” star, who now tips the scales at an eye-watering 47 stone, told Dafty News: “I was pretty shocked when all this equipment was set up around my bath and they began raising the sub.
“To be honest, I thought I felt something a bit hard when I first sat down in the tub, but thought it was a bit of a crispy bacon butty that I’d been eating in there while I was waiting for the immersion heater to warm up”
This latest discovery comes exactly 10 years after a British Royal Navy destroyer was found in roly-poly, racist comedian cunt, Bernard Manning’s jacuzzi.