Drivers Urged Not to Leave Jeremy Corbyn in the Car As Temperatures Soar

With the mercury today set to soar to a blistering 35 degrees celsius in London, drivers are being urged not to leave Labour Party leader, Jeremy Corbyn locked in the car for long periods unattended.

A spokesman for The Royal Society For The Protection of Lefties issued a statement last night: “During this current heatwave, we urge motorists to use common sense and to avoid leaving Jeremy Corbyn locked in the car for any longer than a few minutes, not even with the back window wound down a bit. Due to their beards, cardigans, and donkey jackets, left-wing politicians are particularly vulnerable in extremely hot conditions.

“If you have no choice but to take Jeremy Corbyn with you on a car journey, ensure that he has a bottle of Evian spring water in his duffel bag and a coolbox to keep his Lenin-style cap in, in case he needs to take it off at some point.”

This warning invokes memories of the shocking incident in 1968, when a close to death, left-wing firebrand, Denis “The Beast of Bolsover” Skinner, had to be freed from a Vauxhall Viva by firemen during a prolonged July hot spell. after being left in the vehicle for 3 days by prime minister, Harold Wilson.

 

 

 

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