The BBC came under fire last night as a production assistant on the highly-acclaimed, The Blue Planet series, presented by Sir David Attenborough, revealed that a number of scenes were filmed under the water in the Duchess of York, Sarah Ferguson’s giant toilet, which was specially constructed to accommodate her massive arse when she lived in Buckingham Palace with Prince Andrew.
The insider told newsmen: “We started running out of money halfway through the series and decided to save a few quid by filming some of the deep water scenes down Fergie’s gigantic toilet.
“We dropped a few tropical fish into the bowl and then went down ourselves in a 3-man sub to do the filming.
“Things were fine until Fergie came in for a morning shit one day and we had to manoeuvre the sub to dodge a few of her massive chods.
“At one point she let fly with a massive fart that made the water pretty turbulent, it was touch and go as she followed up with a few minor squeakers, but we managed to escape safe and sound.
“I told Sir David what we’d done but he just said “Fuck it lads, nobody will know any different and we can use Fergie’s submerged rockets as examples of weird and wonderful marine rock formations”
Sir David was unavailable for comment last night but his housekeeper told Dafty News that he’ll be giving a statement when he comes back from filming a jungle documentary inside roly-poly, BBC London broadcaster, Vanessa Feltz’s giant pants.