Man Beaten Up in Mens’ Breakfast Club For Making Himself Very Important

Man Beaten Up in Mens' Breakfast Club For Making Himself Very Important

A 45-YEAR-OLD man at a breakfast club was slammed and beaten to a pulp this morning after he made himself very, very important for the second week running at a men’s’ breakfast club, it has emerged.

The unnamed man, thought to work in insurance or in the mortgage industry, was invited two weeks ago to a breakfast club organized by his friend who works in the building industry, but the well-dressed man was told not to come back before being beaten up by the burly builders after he unleashed a tirade of boasting and self-important commentary.

Witnesses inside the local cafe said they were disgusted by the man dressed in a suit boasted to the other men about his golf handicap, how much his house cost and how many miles he gets to the gallon in his 4×4 vehicle.

Speaking to Dafty News, the witness who wishes not to be named, said: “The guy was a complete twat. He was sitting there with a group of heavy-set ordinary guys from the building trade and boasting about all the nonsensical, trivial, and very unimportant things in life. The other guys warned him not to come back before launching a set of blows on the guy. It was great to watch and very justified.”

Meanwhile, the owners of the establishment hailed the builders before making the following statement:

“Everybody knows a mens’ breakfast club in a greasy spoon cafe is supposed to be a bit of fun where slagging trade-offs take place among working-class guys. This person was invited but he thought he was above everybody at the table and got what he deserved.”

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