I’d make new Dr Who get her tits out says Game of Thrones author

I'd make new Dr Who get her tits out says Game of Thrones author
by Danny SoZ

The creator of the blockbuster, swords and sorcery TV series, Game of Thrones, has reacted to the revelation that the next Dr Who is to be a woman by announcing that he’d definitely have the actress playing the part topless in most episodes and would even feature a few saucy romps from time to time.

George Martin, 95, told us last night: “I’d make sure her kit was off regularly right from the word go. There’s very little point in having a female play the role if she’s not treating the viewers to her tits every 5 minutes.

“I’d write in a few sex scenes too. Maybe she could be filmed having a three’s-up with a couple of Cybermen or noshing off a line of Daleks in the Tardis toilet. Something along those lines”

We spoke to the Chairman of The Dr Who Enthusiasts League last night.

Toby Dell, 12 and a half, told us: “I’m not sure it would be a good idea for the new Doctor to be sexualised in this way.

“You have to remember that most of our middle-aged fans still watch it with their mums and dads, so it will be pretty tricky if they have to hurry out of the room every 5 minutes under the pretext of making a cup of tea while the Doctor’s being blasted with scalding alien spadge or taking a vicious seeing-to from The Master while bent over the control module of the Tardis”

A BBC spokesman, however, last night assured viewers that there are no plans to introduce nudity or explicit sex scenes in the forthcoming series.

“We don’t feel the need for cheap sensationalism to attract our viewers. You can produce a perfectly watchable TV show without featuring spurting nobs and foaming growlers every 5 minutes so there’ll be no tits in the Tardis for the foreseeable future”

The new series begins with an hour-long special on Christmas Day this year. The show will start at 5.00 so that fans worn out by the big day will be able to snuggle down in bed early with their new dollies and action figures, leaving mum and dad to enjoy the James Bond film and tuck into the drink.

 

 

 

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