LAZYASSVILLE—A 43-year-old unemployed mother-of-seven hit back at jobcentre officials after they found her a job and ruined her twelve years of unemployed bliss, it has emerged.
The woman, who cannot be named for legal reasons but goes by the name of Fat Lazy Annie, broke down in tears as she told our reporters: “I was horrified when they sent me a letter with a job offer. It ruined my whole life.”
The woman, who hasn’t worked more than four days in over two decades, vows to take her case to the European Courts.
She continued: “It is my right to be a lazy sod and spend my days in the house sleeping on the sofa and eating my way through the school hours until my kids come home.”